The 5 Things

The quote of the week this week is one that I use a lot. I have no idea where it came from. Maybe I invented it ... but I don't think I did. Probably heard some comedian say it or something. Anyways, it is "Relationships are like pancakes, you always fuck up the first one." Anytime I make pancakes, the first one comes out burnt or sticks to the pan or is off color or something. You always make some stupid mistake that allows you to end the morning with a nice fluffy stack of pancakes. Similarly, everyone does something to mess up that first relationship, without even knowing what they are doing. Then when you look back you are like "oh yeah, that was dumb." I know some people get married to their first boy/girlfriend .. they are the exception to the rule.

The link of the week this week is Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy. Anyone familiar with SNL in its 1990s glory run knows about Jack Handy. This website is, seemingly, run by Mr. Handy and is hilarious. I start everyday with a Deep Thought.

The game of the week is Stick Football. Now you Americans simmer down. Football as in the world's game, not America's. The various levels of play allow you to always be competitive, either starting out or mastering the game. You can create your own team for friendly games, pick a country and win a world cup, or pick a Euro Club team and win the Champions League. Win the Champions League and make the Hall of Fame. I am in the Hall of Fame ... I rule.

The picture of the week this week is one I took while working in Portland, Oregon. Enjoy.


The video of the week this week is the only time I have ever seen Stephen Colbert actually lose himself to the comedy. Sure, every once in a while you'll see him laugh and he covers his mouth or you can tell he is laughing and he cannot do anything to fight the breaking of character. There is nothing quite like this though. It brings Stephen, Jon Stewart, and me to tears every time: