A hippie was walking down the road and a homeless man asked him for some change. The hippie apologized and said "Sorry man, I'm all out." The homeless man berated him for a minute, following the hippie for a block, finally yelling "Oh and by the way, take a bath you smell awful." To which the hippie replied, "Well if that isn't a case of the pot calling the frog green."
A bird in the hand is usually dead. And probably fried. Especially at a picnic.
All's well that ends. Well...
Time is an herb that cures all diseases. Except, you know, death.
Good things come in small packages. Many girlfriends disagree.
Children are a poor man's riches. Especially on the black market.
Ok I did not change this one at all ... I don't need to because the changing of times has made this one ridiculous sounding: Children suck the mother when they are young and the father when they are old.
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