Don't worry about a thing. Cus every little thing is gonna be alright

Warning this post is about fantasy football. Stop reading now if you don't care (read: you most likely do not care at all and it is way too long).

Today I would like to talk to you about why I enjoy fantasy football so much. I have watched 5 seconds of the NFL this year. When Carolina beat San Diego in week one on a last second touchdown. I watched that highlight. That is the end of my football experience this year. My basic plan every year is to make a ton of transactions throughout the year and try to find the sleepers that have huge years and let me win it all. Sometimes this fails miserably, sometimes it is amazing. Sometimes you pick up the person who is the second highest scoring back in your fantasy league as a free agent after the draft and cut them before week 1. (Sorry Matt Forte, I knew you'd be good, but I had LT, the Edge, Selvin Young, Justin Fargas, and Ricky Williams -thought he'd be a goal line back -- and made a poor decision)

Nothing is better than picking up the person who comes out of nowhere to save your season. I got Maurice Jones-Drew a few years ago. It was wonderful. This year I pride myself on picking up Steve Slaton in both my leagues, Mark Bradley (in a league with 3 WR playing), Lance Moore, Chad Pennington, Ronnie Brown, Shaun Hill, and recently Peyton Hillis.

I also enjoy bailing on a former superstar early in their collapse. This is why I am upset I still own Steven Jackson. I did not even want to draft him, the computer did it because I was late to my draft because I was at work, and he is on some odd "no cut list". This year I bailed on Chad Ocho Cinco and Torry Holt after week 1 and Edgerrin James and Larry Johnson in week 9 (though only LJ had played for me and that was once and I should have cut them earlier). After Kitna decided to suck I grabbed Pennington and cut Kitna after he got hurt. I later picked up Shaun Hill and traded him with Andrew Johnson (he is such a beast) for Eli Manning and Kevin Walter (same team as Johnson and just about as productive). It was worked out well.

I play in two leagues. One is people from high school, or know the guy who put it together, whom I never see or talk to anymore. It is structured in a way to have low scoring affairs and you can't drop certain people even if the computer drafted the first round for you and picked them and they have been unproductive and hurt all season. I have the most points out of anyone in the league, just got to 7-5, and today I unofficially clinched a playoff spot (i win the tiebreaker because of points).

The other is filled with a hodge podge of people that were friends with my roommate in college. I know basically all of them and we spend a good amount of time laughing at each other. (Both leagues are in their 4th or 5th year.) This league is much more high scoring, you play defensive players (Barrett Ruud is my man) and one year I lost the title only because Peyton Manning rested for the playoffs in our championship week.

This year in this league there have been strange, strange happenings. There was a stat adjustment 3 days after the games were over in a week that caused the outcome of a week to change, a defensive back getting 33 points on Monday Night Football to seal a 30 point comeback, and then there was tonight.

I desperately needed a win in this league to make the playoffs. I threw out this lineup: Eli Manning and Aaron Rodgers at QB (Chad Pennington on the bench), Lance Moore, Kevin Walter, and Justin Gage at WR (Mark Bradley and Derrick Mason on bench), LT and Peyton Hillis at RB (Steve Slaton, Leon Washington, Derrick Ward on the bench), Kevin Boss at TE, Neil Rackers at K, Jacksonville for my team D, and we play 2 DB and 2 DL every week (I'll spare those names).

The previous week I had won 167.97-147.11. After that game I picked up Leon Washington, Derrick Ward, Peyton Hillis, Justin Gage, Derrick Mason, Jacksonville D and cut Byron Leftwich (in case Big Ben was hurt), Matt Jones, Ray Rice, Anthony Gonzalez (bad call), the Miami D (a wonderful decision), and a DL.

Making my roster I almost added Minnesota D instead of Jacksonville. Minnesota's D dominated Jax this week. Oops. At the very last minute I took Bradley out and put Gage in the lineup. Gage just got healthy and was high risk high reward for TDs. He was awful. Bradley, of course, caught another TD. I benched Slaton because he was banged up and put in Hillis because he is Denver's only back now and he is goal line material. Though I nearly replaced him with Leon Washington because he is nasty. I was supposed to check to see if Jacobs was hurt or not for the Giants. If he was, then I was going to put in War instead of Hillis. I seriously contemplated replacing LT.

At the end of Sunday I had played everyone but Lance Moore and Aaron Rodgers. My opponant had played everyone but a WR for New Orleans (just like Moore). The score was 147.04 – 201.73. I was not winning. The average score in our league is 152.86. So he was killing. I somehow needed 60 points from two players. 30 points by a QB would have been the 4th best score from Sunday. For a WR it would have been second (Randy Moss had a game).

Rubbing salt in the wounds was the fact that I left 105.61 points on the bench. Gage failed miserably, but Bradley did awesome. Mason sucked ... hence why I did not play him and later cut him. Slaton had an ok game, but no TDs. Derrick Ward did slightly better than Hillis, they both had a TD. Leon Washington decided to get two TDs. Chad Pennington threw for 341 yards and 3 TDs. That was the 3rd best showing by any QB this week. Glad he was on my bench. To be fair to me he was playing NE (they still lost) and my QBs played N.O. and Arizona who generally are lacking in defense.

During the game Rodgers threw 3 interceptions. I lose points for that. Lance Moore, for some odd reason, decided to throw a pass and got picked off. Tres bizarre. Good news: his WR caught only one pass and amassed 1.10 points. The final score was 51-29 in the MNF game. Rodgers threw 2 TDs and ran for one and Moore caught two TDs and had over 100 yards receiving. Somehow they both amassed over 60 points and I won 206.73-202.83.

If I had played my optimal lineup, I would have had 240.73 points and he would have had 222.10. The person on his bench that outscored his real player definitely should have started over a WR he had in the lineup. He also had a DB who ended up not playing.

So now I have basically gotten into the playoffs, which is always fun. I also promptly cut Gage (he will go insane this week with 2 TDs I bet) and Mason and added Anthony Gonzalez back, switched in Vinatieri for Rackers (going for the dome + Peyton option for a K), picked up Minnesota and Miami defenses (Minny is nasty and Miami plays the horrible Rams, and switched out a DL. I put Pennington in for Manning because Miami plays the Rams and Giants are playing the Redskins (horrible team or stout D ... I'll choose the guy versus a horrible team), put Bradley back in the lineup (they play Oakland ... always shaky), put Washington in for Hillis (play the Broncos who cannot stop the run) and so far have left in LT because he plays Atlanta which struggles against the run, I am still waiting for him to explode for 3 TDs, and because ever without scoring he is the 7th most productive back in the league somehow. That being said, I may put Hillis, Slaton or Ward in for him later this week. I can't make up my mind. I know he will dominate the moment I bench him.

Sidenote .. I also have made the most transactions in both my leagues. In the Raleigh leagues I am up to 115 (2nd place = 80 and 3rd = 39).