Bought a ticket for a runaway train like a madman laughin' at the rain

Whale Cancer's How to Guide: How to confuse and anger a woman

Step 1: Put her behind the wheel of a car. Just kidding.

Seriously though. This is a how to guide on how to confuse and anger a woman. Specifically a woman who may be interested in dating you. The best part of this is you can do it without even meaning to do anything. Basically, be a clueless gentleman.

So first off meet the girl. Do not try to pick her up. Do not try to be cool or suave. Just listen to her. Talk to her. Be everything that the girl dreams about in her Prince Charming. Make her laugh. That is key. Eventually she will start to fall for "you". What you do next is very important. You do nothing.

Invite her out to dinner or a movie. She will think it is a date. You might even pay for it. Then do not do anything. Don't "make a move". No holding hands, nothing. Flirt excessively. At the end of the night give her a hug. Then say bye and walk away. If you had a rear view mirror you would see the most confused look in the world. Eventually over time this will turn into anger. However, since you have done nothing wrong to her, in fact you have been great to her, this anger will never boil to the surface.

So now you know how to both confuse and anger a woman. Go forth in your awkwardness and ruin a girl's month by being a complete, asexual gentleman. Extra points if you actually like the girl and do not do anything because of fear. You sir have mastered this advice.